As I put on my favorite green sweater this morning, I realized that I wore the same sweater exactly one year ago today. Which, in itself, is an odd thing because I can rarely remember what I wore 3 days ago, much less what I wore exactly one year ago to the day.
But March 13th, 2007 was the most out-of-the-ordinary — extraordinary, perhaps — ordinary day that I’ve ever had. I mean, nothing earth shattering happened that day, really. Except for the fact that I lived the entire day “in the moment”. I’ve often wondered exactly why I was able to pass through that day in a mindful state and have failed miserably at the same thing for all but of a few of the 365 days that followed it. I wish I had an answer.
On March 13th, 2007, I woke up, showered, put on my favorite green sweater and denim skirt, and instead of blow-drying and straightening my hair, as usual, I had the crazy idea to wear it curly to work. This alone, made the day strange. People had no idea that my hair was curly, and I was bombarded with comments — all positive — all day. I felt radiant and even beautiful.
This was me, that day:
On top of that, however, I remember being so aware of the weather. It was the first warm day in months — since winter began — and it held the promise of spring. When I got home from work, I sat on the front porch, in my glider, reading the book “The Highest Tide” and breathing in the damp, earthy air and thinking how remarkable it felt to be so keenly aware of *EVERYTHING*.
I felt like I was on the verge of something big, even though I didn’t know what at the time. It was as if some force was telling me to pay attention because I didn’t want to sleep through what was going to happen next. It was truly a glorious day, and every once in awhile a smell, a sound, a thought will bring me back to that day and I recall the sense of calm that had wrapped itself around me that rare day.
So, now it’s a year later and I realize I had been on the verge of something big. And so many, many changes in me and my life have occurred since then. Some good and some bad. Today, my hair is straight. It is shorter, and redder . . . and instead of reading the book “The Highest Tide” on the front porch on a day that feels like spring, I am reading a book on Self-Coaching your way out of chronic depression. The day is chilly and overcast, and there are only minor hints that spring is on the way. But as different as things are today than they were a year ago, there are still similarities. I, once again, feel like I’m on the verge of something. The book I’m reading now talks about how important it is to quiet the negative thoughts that pop into your head, and the best way to conquer them is to live mindfully. To pay attention to “the now”. Like I said before, I’m not terribly good at this, but I am motivated to improve on it.
It is now time to focus on the task at hand, and to remain with it wholly until it is complete. Wish me luck.
Here’s to paying attention to “the now” . . .
Speaking of . . . Check out this Awareness Test to see how well you pay attention to what’s going on around you. Amazing!!
